{"id":5412,"date":"2024-11-18T02:08:13","date_gmt":"2024-11-18T02:08:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/?p=5412"},"modified":"2024-11-18T02:08:13","modified_gmt":"2024-11-18T02:08:13","slug":"obligacion-o-eleccion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2024\/11\/18\/obligacion-o-eleccion\/","title":{"rendered":"Obligation or choice"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><a href=\"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2024\/11\/11\/poniendome-al-dia-o-al-menos-intentandolo\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/es_es\/2024\/11\/11\/poniendome-al-dia-o-al-menos-intentandolo\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Last week<\/a> I said I would comment on <strong>the difference between having to do something and choosing to do it<\/strong>. I was sure I had already blogged on this topic, but I haven\u00b4t been able to find the article, so here\u00b4s my reflection from today, at the risk of repeating myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Think for a moment about all the things you have to do today, or this week, or regularly as part of your day-to-day. If you have the time, sit down with pen and paper and write a list, as comprehensive as possible, starting each line with the words <strong>\"I have to...\"<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Examples: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>I have to get up early tomorrow.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I have to go to work. <\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I have to prepare meals.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"676\" height=\"507\" data-attachment-id=\"5411\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/img_20241112_072759\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?fit=4000%2C3000&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"4000,3000\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"IMG_20241112_072759\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?fit=676%2C507&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=676%2C507&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Photo of an empty train station at sunrise, with two tracks and a platform. Behind the platform fence y can see a field, and above it all, a light blue sky with orange reflections on the low clouds\" class=\"wp-image-5411\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=768%2C576&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=1536%2C1152&amp;ssl=1 1536w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=2048%2C1536&amp;ssl=1 2048w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=16%2C12&amp;ssl=1 16w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=676%2C507&amp;ssl=1 676w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?resize=600%2C450&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?w=1352&amp;ssl=1 1352w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 676px) 100vw, 676px\" \/><\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">(Photo of the sunrise from Adamstown station, on a day I got up early to take the train to Dublin). <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now read that list carefully. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How do you feel?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I remember doing this exercise a few years ago and feeling all those \"I have to\" as an enormous weight on my shoulders, like a giant boulder crushing me, giving me no alternative but to meet my obligations. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because that\u00b4s the hidden assumption, that <strong>every \"I have to\" is an obligation<\/strong>. And spending one\u00b4s day meeting obligations is not only boring\/stressful\/depressing (choose the adjective you resonate most with), but it is also energy-draining, and, in the long term, simply exhausting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, <strong>what if we could think about those tasks in a way that motivated us, instead of getting us bored, stressed out or depressed?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Here\u00b4s where the transformative power of words comes into play. Because <strong>words matter, and they matter a lot. The ones we pronounce out loud and the ones we say to ourselves, which are our thoughts at the end of the day.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now try writing the same list again, but instead of starting each line with \"I have to...\", start it with <strong>\"I choose...\"<\/strong>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>I choose to get up early tomorrow.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I choose to go to work.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I choose to prepare meals.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Read this new list carefully. What do you think of it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What you just did is turn every task from your day into a choice instead of an obligation. But just changing the words is not enough: <strong>we have to realize that we\u00b4re truly the ones deciding to do all of those things, the same way we choose not to do others. And then assume that responsibility.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because <strong>even though it often seems like we have no other choice, the truth is, in the vast majority of cases (if not always), we actually do<\/strong>. So, the next step is to observe these tasks one by one, see what other options are available, and analyze the consequences (both in the short and long term) of each of those options. Am I willing to accept the consequences of not getting up early, not going to work, not cooking? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You may find that some of the tasks are not as indispensable as you thought; maybe they\u00b4re things you just keep doing out of inertia, without reflecting on whether they still make sense, or perhaps something someone proposed to you (or imposed on you) at some point and you just accepted without questioning. <strong>Giving yourself permission to choose something different from now on <\/strong>may lighten some of your load. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">OK, that\u00b4s great, so what about the others? What about those tasks from the list for which choosing another option is not viable? What you can do in those cases is <strong>reestablish your motivation, your intention, the benefit that the task is going to bring you (or the damage it\u00b4s going to avoid)<\/strong>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>I choose to get up early so that I can dedicate some time to myself, get organized and feel in control of my day (or alternatively: when I don\u00b4t get up early, I have to run around, I start my day already feeling behind and I get more stressed out, so I choose to get up early).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I choose to go to work to earn my salary and also to feel fulfilled and grow as a professional (or alternatively: if I don\u00b4t go to work, they will end up firing me, so I won\u00b4t be able to pay my mortgage or go on holidays, and I may not find another job I like, so I choose to go to work).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I choose to prepare meals so that my family and I maintain a balanced diet, stay healthy and have enough energy (or alternatively: if I don\u00b4t prepare meals beforehand, we\u00b4ll end up eating poorly, and we\u00b4ll have health problems down the line, so I choose to cook).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What do you think? Do you notice the difference between perceiving things as an obligation versus embracing them as our own choice?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just one final comment: if you find that \"I choose...\" is too difficult for you to use, if it feels too forced to you, then <strong>another alternative to using \"I have to...\" can be simply saying \"I\u00b4m going to...\"<\/strong>. This way, you don\u00b4t get stuck on whether you\u00b4re deciding for yourself or someone else is deciding for you: you\u00b4re going to do it, you get it done, and that\u00b4s it. Mission accomplished!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-pullquote\"><blockquote><p>The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.<\/p><cite>William James<\/cite><\/blockquote><\/figure>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>La semana pasada se me qued\u00f3 en el tintero un comentario sobre la diferencia entre tener que hacer algo y elegirlo. Yo estaba convencida de que ya hab\u00eda escrito de este tema aqu\u00ed en el blog, pero no he sido capaz de encontrar d\u00f3nde, as\u00ed que aqu\u00ed va mi reflexi\u00f3n de hoy, aun a riesgo &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2024\/11\/18\/obligacion-o-eleccion\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Obligation or choice<\/span><\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":3116429,"featured_media":5411,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","advanced_seo_description":"BinaryWords - Obligaci\u00f3n o elecci\u00f3n \/ Obligation or choice","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"\u00bfQu\u00e9 eliges hacer hoy? \/ What are you choosing to do today?","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2},"_wpas_customize_per_network":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5106,4990,5001],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5412","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-coaching","category-inspiracion-inspiration","category-palabras-words","fallback-thumbnail"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/IMG_20241112_072759.jpg?fit=4000%2C3000&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3DPtR-1pi","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":9061,"url":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2026\/05\/04\/cita-del-dia\/","url_meta":{"origin":5412,"position":0},"title":"Quote of the day","author":"binarybea","date":"04\/05\/2026","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00bfTe gustan las citas y frases c\u00e9lebres? Si llevas un tiempo leyendo este blog, sabr\u00e1s que a m\u00ed s\u00ed, y que a menudo pongo alguna en mis art\u00edculos, aunque intento no pasarme. Hoy, al encender el ordenador, Google me ha mostrado una cita de Ralph Waldo Emerson que ya conoc\u00eda\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Inspiraci\u00f3n&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Inspiraci\u00f3n","link":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/category\/inspiracion-inspiration\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/IMG_20260502_084322.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/IMG_20260502_084322.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/IMG_20260502_084322.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/IMG_20260502_084322.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/IMG_20260502_084322.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1771,"url":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2022\/11\/28\/coleccionando-citas\/","url_meta":{"origin":5412,"position":1},"title":"Collecting quotes","author":"binarybea","date":"28\/11\/2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Esta semana se ha celebrado Acci\u00f3n de Gracias en Estados Unidos, y si os hab\u00e9is paseado estos d\u00edas por las redes sociales, seguramente habr\u00e9is visto (entre anuncio y anuncio de ofertas del Black Friday) un mont\u00f3n de citas inspiradoras sobre el agradecimiento. (Si os apetece leer un post sobre el\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Inspiraci\u00f3n&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Inspiraci\u00f3n","link":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/category\/inspiracion-inspiration\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Wooden scrabble letters forming the phrase \"Say thank you\"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/pexels-photo-7428022.jpeg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/pexels-photo-7428022.jpeg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/pexels-photo-7428022.jpeg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/pexels-photo-7428022.jpeg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/pexels-photo-7428022.jpeg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1049,"url":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/2022\/06\/19\/frases-intraducibles-food-for-thought\/","url_meta":{"origin":5412,"position":2},"title":"Untranslatable sentences: food for thought","author":"binarybea","date":"19\/06\/2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Como ya he dicho un par de veces en este mismo blog, hay algunas frases en ingl\u00e9s que me encantan y para las que no encuentro una buena traducci\u00f3n al espa\u00f1ol, y viceversa. 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(Qu\u00e9 poco original soy, todos los a\u00f1os empiezo con la misma frase... Si te apetece leer mis reflexiones sobre la Semana Santa en a\u00f1os anteriores, las tienes aqu\u00ed, aqu\u00ed y aqu\u00ed.) 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Recuerdo que durante los primeros meses de escribir este blog, all\u00e1\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Inspiraci\u00f3n&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Inspiraci\u00f3n","link":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/category\/inspiracion-inspiration\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/IMG_20190716_190634_798.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/IMG_20190716_190634_798.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/IMG_20190716_190634_798.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/binarywords.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/IMG_20190716_190634_798.jpg?fit=900%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3116429"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5412"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5419,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412\/revisions\/5419"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5411"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5412"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5412"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/binarywords.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5412"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}