Once again, Sunday comes along and I sit down to write the article of the week, mentally going over the past seven days. To be honest, this last work week was extremely busy with travelling, going to the office and doing various tasks, plus dealing with a passing virus at home, so I was very much looking forward to Saturday and Sunday, to have the chance to "laze around".
Pero claro, como suele pasar, durante el fin de semana también había cosas que hacer, empezando por llevar a mi hija mayor al aeropuerto a las seis de la mañana el sábado…
Under normal circumstances, I would have taken advantage of the early morning start and continued doing "productive" things all day, but given that I know this often leads me to ending up feeling as tired on weekends as I am on weekdays (if not more), this time I intentionally decided to take breaks throughout the day to rest and relax. And I remembered once again that question my friend Marilyn asked me a couple of years ago, not long after we first met:
Hey, when do you usually stop?
I remember being really surprised by this, as I was completely unaware of this behaviour of mine. But her question was an eye opener; from that moment on, I started watching myself, and I discovered that she was spot on: very often I would go the whole day without stopping. How could I not end up tired? I my head there was always a long list of to-do´s, even if I reduced it to what I considered the bare minimum.
Once we become aware of a certain behaviour, we have the power to change it if we want, for example if it´s going to have damaging consequences in the long term, like working too much, or not resting enough.
And how do we go about changing it? Well, by digging a bit to find out what beliefs are hiding behind that behaviour, based on clues from the language we use, from the way we talk to ourselves.
In the specific example from above, the clue is in the words "laze around". Unconsciously, my mind thinks: if I´m lazying around, it´s because I´m a lazy person. But I don´t want to be a lazy person! I want to be productive, and useful to society. So I mentally kick myself, I tell myself: "do something useful", and then that´s what I do, "productive" and "useful" things, one after the other, one day after another, until I reach my limit.
Does that help me? Not at all, because even though I´m achieving things in the short term, it´s not a sustainable approach in the long term. At some point one has to rest, switch off and enjoy life a little, otherwise there can be very serious consequences. So here´s where I have to change my mindset and realise that rest is not laziness, it´s self-care, and that self-care is absolutely indispensable in order to have a good life.
Furthermore, it´s only when we take care of ourselves (a través de la dieta, el ejercicio, el descanso, la conexión con nosotros mismos y con los demás…) that we have enough energy to keep going and help those around us, so my initial goal of being a productive person, useful to society, ends up being achieved in a much better way with this indirect approach, and with the added bonus of enjoyment along the way.
What about you? How good are you at taking a well deserved break every now and then? I hope you find time during this Easter/Spring break to switch off and take care of yourself, in whichever way you see fit.